2002/06/26 18:27

I went in to Kaiser at 9AM to get a small-needle biopsy done. About 2 hours later my doctor called me and informed me that I have been diagnosed with lymphoma, which is cancer of the lymphatic system.

I asked him if it was Hodgkin's Disease, which is also known as Hodgkin's Lymphoma, or Non-Hodgkin's Lymphoma; he said that they didn't know yet, and that they needed me to come in for another blood test this afternoon. He said that they are hoping it's Hodgkin's Disease, as that is a curable form of cancer.

Definition of Lymphoma, from http://www.webmd.com/ :

"Non-Hodgkin's lymphoma is a type of cancer. Lymphoma is a general term for cancers that develop in the lymphatic system. Hodgkin's disease is one type of lymphoma. All other lymphomas are grouped together and are called non-Hodgkin's lymphoma. Lymphomas account for about 5 percent of all cases of cancer in this country."

He told me that they would use the blood sample I gave this afternoon to determine whether it was Hodgkin's Lymphoma or not; he told me to expect a call from an oncologist, a doctor specializing in cancer, tomorrow.

They are going to set up appointments for me to get a CT scan of the body, sometimes called a CAT scan, to determine if the cancer has spread to my spleen or into my bone marrow:

"Computed tomography scan. A series of detailed pictures of areas inside the body; the pictures are created by a computer linked to an x-ray machine. Also called computed axial tomography (CAT) scan."

Apparently they also need to do a bone marrow biopsy, which can be done in two ways:

• Inserting a needle through the person's skin and directly into the bone (closed, needle, or drill biopsy). A numbing medication (local anesthetic) is used to prevent pain during this procedure.
  
• Making a surgical cut (incision) through the person's skin that exposes more of the bone (open biopsy). The person is given general anesthesia or given medication to block feeling in the area where the incision is made (spinal anesthesia or peripheral nerve block) for this procedure.
  

I'm still in shock. I've told my parents and some of my close friends, but I'm still having trouble believing it.

I realized something today: the wants and needs in your life are subject to constant change depending on your life situation. Under normal circumstances we don't normally notice this flux, as the changes don't tend to be severe.

What made me realize this was:

• 2 days ago I was hoping that I was just sick with the flu and that it wasn't anything serious.
  
• 1 day ago, yesterday, I was hoping that it was some kind of STD instead of cancer -- they made it clear that it was something serious.
  
• Today I'm hoping it's Hodgkin's Lymphoma instead of non-Hodgkin's Lymphoma.
  

I'm actually hoping for one form of cancer over another; the lesser of the two evils, so to speak.

I got my Strapping Young Lad hooded sweatshirt in the mail today, and it came with a picture of Devin Townsend playing his guitar. That man is the master of the metal-face. The sweatshirt kicks total ass -- I can't wait to wear it.

I'm still in shock, I think.